My town is famous

My tiny hometown is getting mad publicity around the 50th anniversary of the publication of Peyton Place, which was written by a woman from there, Grace Metalious, and was a thinly veiled account of incestuous doings and scandal. The book naturally proceeded to piss off everybody in town, who proceeded to ostracize Grace in the best Yankee fashion, who in turn proceeded to die at age 39 of cirrhosis and a broken heart. There's an article in Vanity Fair, an AP article, and there's going to be a movie with Sandra Bullock, of all people, playing Grace.

I totally resent the way the AP writer began his stupid article:

"The borders of this Colonial-era town suggest an A-frame house on the brink of toppling over. They form a squarish figure with a triangular extension that appears raised to the right and balanced on one corner, as if a mere push could send it tumbling down to Massachusetts.

For the most part, history has respected Gilmanton to the point of indifference. No wars have been fought here, no gold or oil discovered. There have been no major plagues or natural disasters. No president, movie star or Internet billionaire was born in Gilmanton or uses one of its lakefront residences as a summer home."

We are NOT tumbling down to Taxachusetts, mister. And I'll have you know that we have produced a famous serial killer, Herman Webster Mudgett, aka Henry Holmes. I think I'm going to write and ask for a correction.

Also, nobody interviewed my parents, and they should have.